Fuckboi-ism & Fall of the Pumpkin Spice Fairy

And now, two impromptu poems:

Fuckboi-ism

You shack up in a committed relationship
or stay single long enough to become a fuckboi

You think it can't happen to you
you have morals but morals are shit
when it comes to carnal desires
Logic goes out the window

Drink that bottle of whiskey
Wallow in self-pity
Lie to yourself
Message that person that likes you
for a reasons you can't begin to fathom

Use them
Neglect them
Discourage them
Wait two months
Draw them back in
Repeat

Before you realize what've you become
it's too late
It's been three years
It's habit

You are fuckboi
Fuckboi are you
Never to be trusted again
until you put on that sheep's clothing

~~~

Fall of the Pumpkin Spice Fairy


Every September 22nd
after weeks of anticipation
the Pumpkin Spice Fairy awakes from her slumber
to grace lattes and baked goods with her presence
She scoots around on the Great Pumpkin
leaving nutmeg trails in her wake
She dons custom orange cardigans
inspiring fashion designers' creations
She hums Danny Elfman scores
while watching foliage land on the lake
She dines with Oprah
for the October Favorite Things luncheon

But this November 1st,
her nationwide tour of the States
was snipped by a cold breeze
scented by peppermint from the North
Jacqueline Frost appeared early
to answer the cries of those
yearning for Christmas
The fairy pleaded for one more month
to at least make it to Thanksgiving
but Ms Frost turned a deaf ear and cold shoulder
pushing the Pumpkin Spice Fairy back
until you knocked her head against a tree
banished until next year's Autumn.



Word